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Tuesday 5 July 2016

Vacation Blog VII: Mon Ami Gabi and whatever else we manage to fit in today

9:30 AM - Well this is not so bad but considering what time I got to bed last night, not quite what I was hoping for. My brilliant prognosticating skills are predicting a nap in short order.

I head out to Target to replenish a few supplies that we need, starting with milk because some fucking dumbass didn't notice that the skim milk he purchased the other day was ALREADY expired. It's tough to find skim milk in the States, which might explain why the population of this country is so goddamned fat. It might be one of 1000 reasons (what's that? For $9.99 I can buy 100 Chicken McNuggets or three broccoli crowns???? Cluck cluck cluck!!!).

We have breakfast in the resort and relax a bit, and then it hits us....the nap monster has arrived.

2:30 PM - We both wake up. I had a good nap and Tracey's nap was fair to middling at best. Time for our leftover Chinese food to get us through to our late dinner tonight.

3:30 PM - Off to the Venetian for a little shopping, and sightseeing, and an opportunity for me to grab a lot of hot girl's asses.

What? Really?

Really.

Lindsay Lohan really was quite pretty before she turned into a total trainwreck.

Not to be a pig, but I swear her boobs are bigger in real life.


Full disclosure: I really wasn't grabbing any of their asses (although J-Lo looked like she was about to kick my ass).

But Katy Perry's cleavage was tough to ignore.


Most of the wax figures were very lifelike, but there was one that almost took my breath away.


Sandra Bullock. I'm not her biggest fan by any stretch, but this was so lifelike I felt like she was looking right into my soul. The eyes, man...the eyes.....they didn't look like a wax figurine at all. I swear I expected her to move at any second. Really, really well done.


"Well, you made a long journey from Milan to Minsk, Rochelle, Rochelle. You never stopped hoping, now your in a Pinsk, Rochelle, Rochelle. When the naysayers 'nay' you picked up your pace. You said nothing's going to stop me so get out of my face. I'm having adventures all over the place, Rochelle, Rochelle!!!"

At this point I swear it doesn't matter what Bette Midler has done in her career before or after, I will never think of her as anything but Macaroni Midler from Seinfeld.

She really is the Wind Beneath My Wings. She is so freaking talented.

And here is a little tribute to a few greats we've lost recently:


Was Whitney really THIS tiny?

Purple Picture, Purple Picture

and the wife got in on the action with some of her gentlemen friends as well.

FINALLY, THE ROCK HAS COME BACK IN LIFELIKE WAX FORM TO LAYETH THE SMACKETH DOWN ON ALL YOUR CANDY ASSES!

I think JT is auditioning for the next Bond movie.


I don't know who this guy is.
And of course, if you want to take true STAR POWER....you want to talk about the BIGGEST STAR IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD...you are clearly talking about this cool cat.



Yup, Grumpy Cat has his own figurine. Actually pretty cute, and it moved.


A brand new Dean in the Rat Pack.


I heard that Wolfgang Puck is pouring an '84 Sassicaia.

So that's about it for Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum. We had not been there in several years, quite fun. And man some of those figurines were so lifelike it was creepy.

7:00 PM - We grab the car and head down to the Paris where we are going to have dinner. No huge hurry for a table, since we are planning to sit outside and soak up the atmosphere. They aren't that busy tonight though, so we actually head to do a bit of shopping where I pick up a couple of T-shirts (one that says "Pardon My #($@)@!$@ French". I swear, is there a more appropriate T-shirt for me to wear???) and then it's time to hit Mon Ami Gabi for dinner.

Although I was planning on a nice bottle of wine to celebrate my tourney winnings from last night we decided on a carafe of their Frangria (Sangria + French...get it???), which is the best I've ever tasted, anywhere. Normally Tracey is the Sangria whore.....and I'm pretty lukewarm on it....but this is spectacular. We are both having Filet Mignon for dinner so I order just a glass of a nice Bordeaux to pair with my steak better than the Frangria would. The wine is a perfect complement to a beautiful piece of meat. We both leave fully satisfied and the price is terrific, as our bill is $140 all in. Incredible food and very good value as well.

11:00 PM - After we donated a couple bucks to the local economy in the form of some slot play, we are both tired and head back to the resort to hit the sack. Another big day tomorrow...although there will be some sleeping in and probably some napping, we are planning some shopping and dining in the Caesar's Palace Forum shops and then up to the Wynn for some spectacular wine and charcuterie at La Cave, our favorite wine bar in Vegas. Can't wait!!


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